tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7693979.post-56932841287427972712008-01-07T16:00:00.000-05:002008-01-07T16:18:31.508-05:002008-01-07T16:18:31.508-05:00The scene: bedtime, in the bedroom. The fattest cat, HIM (between 18-20 lbs.!), jumps into my spot in the bed about 1.2 <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1_E-15_s">femtoseconds</a> after I vacate it to go brush my teeth. Since this is a cat who is too fat to clean his own ass properly (earning him the nickname "A.J.," for "Ass Juice"), I am less than thrilled by this phenomenon, which occurs multiple times per night.<br /><br />Upon my return, I try to slide him from the bed gently onto the floor, mindful of his bum leg. His not inconsiderable belly sloshes around a bit, but he has somehow melded himself onto the bed. I have no choice but to pick him up and drop him onto the floor, and he lands, - you guessed it - right on the stump. Limping, hissing, and reproachful looks back ensue as he hobbles out of the room, and I'm struck with intense guilt. Booby comforts me.<br /><br />"Oh, don't worry about it, honey. He's fine," he says. "I do <span style="font-style: italic;">terrible</span> things to the cats<span style="font-weight: bold;"> all the time</span>."<br /><br />Why can't we have an amusing <a href="http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/01/17/im-poopin/">LOLcat</a>, instead?<span style="display: block;" id="formatbar_Buttons"><span class="" style="display: block;" id="formatbar_CreateLink" title="Link" onmouseover="ButtonHoverOn(this);" onmouseout="ButtonHoverOff(this);" onmouseup="" onmousedown="CheckFormatting(event);FormatbarButton('richeditorframe', this, 8);ButtonMouseDown(this);"></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='http://res1.blogblog.com/tracker/7693979-5693284128742797271?l=www.meangirltotherescue.com'/></div>Mrs. Harridanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01243591806894404860noreply@blogger.com5